Hooligans Running The Streets
Small businesses owners are too scared to come out of their shops and cafes due to hoards to hooligans walking the streets in the early hours of the morning. One café owner who didn’t want to be identified said the individuals walked around freely in bright yellow t-shirts, some wearing scarves. Owner Tim Blacksmith said he hadn’t seen such behaviour in years, and his young staff members were deeply concerned by their actions.
There was no set demographic for the hooligans, just their identifiable colours, or tags as they are known on the street. Most dressed like professionals but were easily detectable by the redness around their eyes. Always travelling in groups, some even carrying briefcases Blacksmith stated there was no place in society for their kind.
What were these young men and women requesting? Coffee and well made coffee. The groups were storming cafes around Australia demanding cappuccinos, double espresso’s, and even soy lattes. These orders were unpredictable, leaving staff members second guessing these ‘patrons’ and feeling intimidated when they asked for extra’s such as hazelnut or caramel.
Research conducted around the office showed that stocks of coffee were in short supply around Australia and these groups were to blame. Not fussy about where the source of the coffee, some were overheard saying “I don’t care if it’s from Kenya, Brazil or Colombia just get it to me quickly”. Others were more specific in their request refusing Kenyan coffee because it wasn’t FIFA approved, whatever that means. We were unable to ascertain who this FIFA group were, but we are sure they are part of the bigger picture.
Supplies are running low across the country and shortages are likely to run into the middle of next month. One patron was overheard saying he would resort to International Roast – Caterers blend, as long as he received his caffeine hit. What type of society are we living in? These people were willing to go to desperate measures to receive their fix.
Another Café owner complained of random 4am visits to his café in Bondi. Mary Fielding said she didn’t even open that early, not even for the illustrious swimming group who were far better types of society drinking your herbal teas and fruit smoothies. Mary was forced to call the Police on a number of occasions last week, with many people peering in the window looking for signs of life, and opening hours. Mary contacted ‘From The Stands’ today and said some of the group were even smiling and chanting at 4am this morning, talking about their messiah Ange someone, what kind of weird stuff are these people into. “Its 4am on a Thursday morning for heaven’s sake”.
In Melbourne we heard members were ‘coffee shopping’ for the best deals and loyalty schemes. Some members would order their coffee, then hand their loyalty card around with the 8th person receiving a free coffee, “I mean some people are trying to run a business here” on tearful owner confessed.
We will continue to investigate this story as more information comes to hand. For the general public out there please stay safe and look out for your personal safety. If you see anyone fitting the abovementioned description we urge you to stay inside and contact authorities.
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